Thursday, September 15, 2011
Happy Birthday Mommy
One more thing I just remembered and had to include. After many days at Ft. Myers Beach, Kathy and I decided to celebrate my birthday on Sanibel Island. Joseph had been viewing this island from the beach for days and desperately wanted to go. This is the video Kathy got on our drive. Absolutely precious...
Joseph
Well, if you read Jacob's post then all of the beginning stuff applies here also. Joseph is doing well, though I am afraid he is silently troubled...more on that later.
Medical:
This guy who came home at 37.5 inches and weighed 33.5 pounds has finally begun to grow and is now up to 39.3 inches and 37 pounds. His August visit to the pediatrician also resulted in a diagnosis of giardia. I was not at all surprised as his appetite has been horrible. Then, there is the stinky poop that required a gas mask to enter the bathroom within 30 minutes of his visits. This was only the second treatment for Joseph and based on his improved appetite and less frequent visits to the potty, it was successful. We will re-test soon. Joseph has caught up on vaccinations and does not return to the doctor until next year. His dental visit went well with two teeth beginning to show signs of decay, so lots of extra brushing going on in the back. Other than a few minor colds, Joseph has been quite healthy.
Daycare:
After a lot of thought and weeks of driving to two different locations twice a day, I made the decision to move Joseph to Smyrna Christian School with Jacob. I struggled because he was so adjusted there. He had two fluffy African American teachers who were wonderful, not to mention all of his friends. I find it so important to keep some contact with his own race and so this created the most difficulty in my decision to move him. But, I am happy to report that he is settling into his pre-k class and quickly making new friends. He proudly displays his accomplishments daily and is slowly learning to write his name as he puts the letters of the alphabet to practice.
Emotional:
This is where we struggle. There have been reports of Joseph twisting his friends arm, hitting his friends, and kicking the bathroom wall while in daycare. Then, there is the heartbreaking tale of several weeks ago. We were having a great day...kicked back, watching his favorite movie "Tangled" and eating popcorn....when out of the blue came this question: "Mommy, will YOU ever leave me?" Oh my! I talked through the adoption and that he was with me forever and thought things were soothed over. At bedtime I could tell he was still troubled and so I said, "Joseph, you do know that your Emiyet in Ethiopia loved you very much, don't you?"Well, that did it and the flood gates burst open. I sat in the bed and explained why he was left in the orphanage and how glad I was that he was with me and we cried. There were several days of unsettled emotion but for now he has quieted the outward display. It is the inward that worries me. This sweet, quiet child that others can't believe would behave inappropriately is angry. I hope to speak with the doctor at his next appointment to see about counseling.
Vacation:
Joseph loved absolutely everything about the trip to the beach. He kept my daughter Kathy and I quite entertained with statements on the drive such as, "Florida sure is a LONG way" and "Mama, I'm afraid of the water" as we passed over a bridge. Joseph, I asked, why are you afraid of the water? "Because I can't swim" he replied with a hint of duh. He played happily in the water and sand, picked mangos from his PawPaw's tree, made a hole-in-one on his first shot at the putt putt golf course, and bonded quite nicely with his PawPaw. There are so many pictures I could share, but here are a few favorites.
In general:
As with Jacob, I am sure there are things I am leaving out, but that is the beauty of this method of entry as I can always add later!
Medical:
This guy who came home at 37.5 inches and weighed 33.5 pounds has finally begun to grow and is now up to 39.3 inches and 37 pounds. His August visit to the pediatrician also resulted in a diagnosis of giardia. I was not at all surprised as his appetite has been horrible. Then, there is the stinky poop that required a gas mask to enter the bathroom within 30 minutes of his visits. This was only the second treatment for Joseph and based on his improved appetite and less frequent visits to the potty, it was successful. We will re-test soon. Joseph has caught up on vaccinations and does not return to the doctor until next year. His dental visit went well with two teeth beginning to show signs of decay, so lots of extra brushing going on in the back. Other than a few minor colds, Joseph has been quite healthy.
Daycare:
After a lot of thought and weeks of driving to two different locations twice a day, I made the decision to move Joseph to Smyrna Christian School with Jacob. I struggled because he was so adjusted there. He had two fluffy African American teachers who were wonderful, not to mention all of his friends. I find it so important to keep some contact with his own race and so this created the most difficulty in my decision to move him. But, I am happy to report that he is settling into his pre-k class and quickly making new friends. He proudly displays his accomplishments daily and is slowly learning to write his name as he puts the letters of the alphabet to practice.
Emotional:
This is where we struggle. There have been reports of Joseph twisting his friends arm, hitting his friends, and kicking the bathroom wall while in daycare. Then, there is the heartbreaking tale of several weeks ago. We were having a great day...kicked back, watching his favorite movie "Tangled" and eating popcorn....when out of the blue came this question: "Mommy, will YOU ever leave me?" Oh my! I talked through the adoption and that he was with me forever and thought things were soothed over. At bedtime I could tell he was still troubled and so I said, "Joseph, you do know that your Emiyet in Ethiopia loved you very much, don't you?"Well, that did it and the flood gates burst open. I sat in the bed and explained why he was left in the orphanage and how glad I was that he was with me and we cried. There were several days of unsettled emotion but for now he has quieted the outward display. It is the inward that worries me. This sweet, quiet child that others can't believe would behave inappropriately is angry. I hope to speak with the doctor at his next appointment to see about counseling.
Vacation:
Joseph loved absolutely everything about the trip to the beach. He kept my daughter Kathy and I quite entertained with statements on the drive such as, "Florida sure is a LONG way" and "Mama, I'm afraid of the water" as we passed over a bridge. Joseph, I asked, why are you afraid of the water? "Because I can't swim" he replied with a hint of duh. He played happily in the water and sand, picked mangos from his PawPaw's tree, made a hole-in-one on his first shot at the putt putt golf course, and bonded quite nicely with his PawPaw. There are so many pictures I could share, but here are a few favorites.
In general:
As with Jacob, I am sure there are things I am leaving out, but that is the beauty of this method of entry as I can always add later!
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| This boy loves him some mango! |
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| Playing in the rain while at Shell Factory Nature Park seemed to remind him of a time in Ethiopia |
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| PawPaw couldn't wait to get Joseph in his golf cart and drive him around |
Catching up with Jacob
As it has been a while since I last posted, I figure each of the boys deserves his own post to catch up. August was a wonderful though busy month. Jacob warmed up nicely to his big brother David and enjoyed as much playtime as we could squeeze in before he returned to Hawaii. We celebrated his niece Kensley's 4th birthday, saw the pediatrician and dentist, and went on the first family vacation!
Medical: Hard to believe how much Jacob has grown. He began in January at 31 inches and 23.4 pounds and is now 35 inches and 28.9 pounds! This despite the giardia...yes, he tested positive again. I was a little surprised as he has been asymptomatic but we treated and will re-test later this month. He has about caught up on vaccinations (PTL) and was not scheduled to return to the pediatrician until November. The dental appointment went better this time. He hates having his teeth brushed and this was no exception.
Jacob contracted hand, foot, and mouth disease at daycare and let me tell you, that was no fun. I have never seen this before. He began with fever and within 24hrs was covered in blisters. He is still peeling from this infection three weeks ago and will definitely have scars resulting. Everything including his little mouth was blistered, so we got some real time to bond and attach further as the only thing comforting was my arms (and ibuprofen, though I like to take credit).
He began coughing last Friday and when I picked him up on Tuesday I wasn't sure I would make it to the hospital in time to prevent a full fledged asthma attack. After a couple of hours, ibuprofen, steroids, and albuterol we were released from the emergency department. Follow-up with the pediatrician was today and he has now crossed the threshold with steroids and is labeled asthmatic. Hopefully the addition of daily zyrtec and inhaled steroids will get a handle quickly on this illness.
Daycare: Here is the other point of interest for this guy. So, after much prayer he began a new daycare the 22nd of August and is doing wonderfully. To catch you up, he was asked to leave the first daycare because of biting. This behavior continued in a home setting so I had no real expectations for improvement. After speaking in length to the director and finding his classroom size to be quadruple that at La Petite with only five other students max, he began Smyrna Christian School. I am beyond thrilled to report that there have been zero incidents of biting and he seems to be adjusting well!!
Vacation: We traveled by car to Ft. Myers, Florida to continue the tradition of celebrating my birthday on the beach. Jacob did quite well traveling with his DVD player and driving by night as much as possible. He was not a fan of the ocean as the waves were up due to lots of rain, but he loved the sand up to and including eating it! I know, this boy is just not right:) He even took his cheese stick and rolled it in the sand for more and discovered that a sea shell makes a nice spoon for dipping!! Despite that (and the fact that he got sick two days into the vacation), we enjoyed a week stay and he won his PawPaw's heart. This has been a long prayer as my Dad was not a fan of the adoption, especially with the color difference, but these two became quick buddies.
In general: It seems I am likely missing some important detail, but for now I will close with the promise to update on Joseph later today. It's hard to believe that a year ago I was in the midst of fundraising to bring this little guy home. God is good indeed!!
Medical: Hard to believe how much Jacob has grown. He began in January at 31 inches and 23.4 pounds and is now 35 inches and 28.9 pounds! This despite the giardia...yes, he tested positive again. I was a little surprised as he has been asymptomatic but we treated and will re-test later this month. He has about caught up on vaccinations (PTL) and was not scheduled to return to the pediatrician until November. The dental appointment went better this time. He hates having his teeth brushed and this was no exception.
Jacob contracted hand, foot, and mouth disease at daycare and let me tell you, that was no fun. I have never seen this before. He began with fever and within 24hrs was covered in blisters. He is still peeling from this infection three weeks ago and will definitely have scars resulting. Everything including his little mouth was blistered, so we got some real time to bond and attach further as the only thing comforting was my arms (and ibuprofen, though I like to take credit).
He began coughing last Friday and when I picked him up on Tuesday I wasn't sure I would make it to the hospital in time to prevent a full fledged asthma attack. After a couple of hours, ibuprofen, steroids, and albuterol we were released from the emergency department. Follow-up with the pediatrician was today and he has now crossed the threshold with steroids and is labeled asthmatic. Hopefully the addition of daily zyrtec and inhaled steroids will get a handle quickly on this illness.
Daycare: Here is the other point of interest for this guy. So, after much prayer he began a new daycare the 22nd of August and is doing wonderfully. To catch you up, he was asked to leave the first daycare because of biting. This behavior continued in a home setting so I had no real expectations for improvement. After speaking in length to the director and finding his classroom size to be quadruple that at La Petite with only five other students max, he began Smyrna Christian School. I am beyond thrilled to report that there have been zero incidents of biting and he seems to be adjusting well!!
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| The start of a very long drive to Florida |
In general: It seems I am likely missing some important detail, but for now I will close with the promise to update on Joseph later today. It's hard to believe that a year ago I was in the midst of fundraising to bring this little guy home. God is good indeed!!
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| Though a little blurry, I love this picture made during a rain storm while we visited the Shell Factory Nature Park. |
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| Leaving dinner with his new best buddy! |
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| This was the usual expression when we tried to get him in the water! |
Sunday, July 31, 2011
July update
Wow, where has the month gone. After beginning the month with the boys feeling horrible it seems as if I have blinked and we are heading into August. It has been a month of more adjustments as I was asked by the director at La Petite to find another place for Jacob to attend (due to the biting). After brief moments of panic I texted a dear friend who agreed to keep him in her home until (or if) I make other arrangements. He is happily playing with her Jacob every day which is fabulous, except for the drive all over Smyrna twice a day. Joseph has an evaluation for pre-K in the public school system this week. If he is accepted I will possibly move them both at that time. I am hoping a nanny I was referred to will work out and they can spend their days at home and eliminate my driving. But for now, both are quite content.
The big news for the month is that big brother David is home! We met him at the airport and Joseph couldn't wait to jump in his arms. Jacob was a bit reserved until David came over to the house and then I suppose he figured he was okay because he ran to the car to greet him and jumped in his arms.
We had family pictures made by my son-in-law and that was quite a disaster :) Jacob screamed essentially every time we sat down to take a picture. The other children ran and played in the rocks and then wiped their hands down the fronts of their white shirts. It was nearly 100 degrees so everyone was soaked with sweat. Nevertheless, we got a few keepers!
The big news for the month is that big brother David is home! We met him at the airport and Joseph couldn't wait to jump in his arms. Jacob was a bit reserved until David came over to the house and then I suppose he figured he was okay because he ran to the car to greet him and jumped in his arms.
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| Finally meeting his big brother David! |
We had family pictures made by my son-in-law and that was quite a disaster :) Jacob screamed essentially every time we sat down to take a picture. The other children ran and played in the rocks and then wiped their hands down the fronts of their white shirts. It was nearly 100 degrees so everyone was soaked with sweat. Nevertheless, we got a few keepers!
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| All the kids and grandkids! |
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| My five children!!! |
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| Beautiful! |
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| Perhaps my favorite, with Joseph and myself clearly showing our lack of support for Jacob's fit |
Wednesday, July 6, 2011
Snotting and sneezing, coughing and wheezing
After nearly a month of come and go symptoms since starting daycare, I finally took the boys to the doctor yesterday praying for some relief. None of us have slept well in over a week due to the persistent cough at night. Diagnosis for Joseph is a double ear and sinus infection. Jacob has walking pneumonia. There had previously been no fevers, but Jacob awoke cranky and febrile this morning. So, after many months we are enjoying some one-on-one time while Joseph attends "school." He is just precious as an only child:)
Update on the biting is that it continues to happen but with less frequency. They are continuing to work with him and moved him to the two year old class this week hoping that would help. He promptly bit a child his age in the face and I was called to pick him up! I truly don't get it as he does not act that way anywhere else. Not that he hasn't bitten, but he certainly doesn't go on the hunt for his next victim. The doctor had several suggestions, all of which I am sure won't be tried because they involve physically restraining him or putting him in time out.
The fourth of July was celebrated most of the weekend (or as Joseph calls it "America's birthday." These two haven't been up past dark since the night they came home and wondered I'm sure why they were sitting in the middle of a grassy field with hundreds of other people. They both sat transfixed as the fireworks lit the night with Jacob promptly falling asleep once in the car. We spent the 4th at my sisters for a cookout and swimming. Jacob would have nothing to do with the "big pool" but Joseph took off in his water wings. He even attempted to swim when I allowed him to take them off for a minute. Guess swimming lessons are in order for next summer.
We await the arrival of my oldest son next week. He is now safely out of Iraq and back in Hawaii, traveling home next week. Joseph is so cute as he says "David on an airoplane, coming to America!" That's all he has to relate flying to and seems very excited to meet his big brother. Following that visit is the CCI reunion and the long awaited beach trip.
That's the quick update for now as I would be plain silly not to take advantage of a mid-afternoon nap.
Update on the biting is that it continues to happen but with less frequency. They are continuing to work with him and moved him to the two year old class this week hoping that would help. He promptly bit a child his age in the face and I was called to pick him up! I truly don't get it as he does not act that way anywhere else. Not that he hasn't bitten, but he certainly doesn't go on the hunt for his next victim. The doctor had several suggestions, all of which I am sure won't be tried because they involve physically restraining him or putting him in time out.
The fourth of July was celebrated most of the weekend (or as Joseph calls it "America's birthday." These two haven't been up past dark since the night they came home and wondered I'm sure why they were sitting in the middle of a grassy field with hundreds of other people. They both sat transfixed as the fireworks lit the night with Jacob promptly falling asleep once in the car. We spent the 4th at my sisters for a cookout and swimming. Jacob would have nothing to do with the "big pool" but Joseph took off in his water wings. He even attempted to swim when I allowed him to take them off for a minute. Guess swimming lessons are in order for next summer.
We await the arrival of my oldest son next week. He is now safely out of Iraq and back in Hawaii, traveling home next week. Joseph is so cute as he says "David on an airoplane, coming to America!" That's all he has to relate flying to and seems very excited to meet his big brother. Following that visit is the CCI reunion and the long awaited beach trip.
That's the quick update for now as I would be plain silly not to take advantage of a mid-afternoon nap.
Saturday, June 18, 2011
A big hurdle
Well, we have finished up two weeks of daycare now and I wish I could say all is well. There were some major stressors week one as Jacob refused to eat and Joseph refused to sleep for the first two to three days. They were both exhausted by the end of the week and seemed to delight in punishing me every moment we were together.
Joseph has done remarkably well adjusting to his "school" and seems now to be settling into a routine. I believe it was day two that I was one of the last mothers to arrive and heard him sobbing from the moment I walked in the door. When I got to him he was full body hysterical saying "but my mama." When he saw me he all but collapsed saying he didn't think I was coming back. I knew he was reminded of the orphanage from our first visit but had no idea he would be so affected. We now have the same conversation every morning as I reassure him that I will be back after work. He is now sleeping and delights in telling me "I took a nap" as soon as I arrive. He has already advanced to a new class because of his 4th birthday and now has a fluffy African American teacher and a best friend Kayla. Besides the fact that he has a head full of congestion and has been coughing non-stop for three days, he is doing very well and looks forward to his time at school.
Jacob is another story. Praise God we have now advanced past his spending every moment at home crying and saying "no" to everything I do. He has cried every day but two when I leave him but greets me with a big "MAMA" and a hug and kiss every afternoon. He is now eating and continues to nap, though a much shorter and earlier nap than he is used to. I know that the reaction to being left is age appropriate but I was nevertheless very excited when he hopped down, said goodbye, and went about playing on Thursday...without a tear. The big issue is a BIG issue as he has begun biting his friends to get what he wants. Now, anyone who has been around this child knows this is not new. You can look at his crib from Ethiopia and know he has issues with chewing and biting.
Joseph has done remarkably well adjusting to his "school" and seems now to be settling into a routine. I believe it was day two that I was one of the last mothers to arrive and heard him sobbing from the moment I walked in the door. When I got to him he was full body hysterical saying "but my mama." When he saw me he all but collapsed saying he didn't think I was coming back. I knew he was reminded of the orphanage from our first visit but had no idea he would be so affected. We now have the same conversation every morning as I reassure him that I will be back after work. He is now sleeping and delights in telling me "I took a nap" as soon as I arrive. He has already advanced to a new class because of his 4th birthday and now has a fluffy African American teacher and a best friend Kayla. Besides the fact that he has a head full of congestion and has been coughing non-stop for three days, he is doing very well and looks forward to his time at school.
Jacob is another story. Praise God we have now advanced past his spending every moment at home crying and saying "no" to everything I do. He has cried every day but two when I leave him but greets me with a big "MAMA" and a hug and kiss every afternoon. He is now eating and continues to nap, though a much shorter and earlier nap than he is used to. I know that the reaction to being left is age appropriate but I was nevertheless very excited when he hopped down, said goodbye, and went about playing on Thursday...without a tear. The big issue is a BIG issue as he has begun biting his friends to get what he wants. Now, anyone who has been around this child knows this is not new. You can look at his crib from Ethiopia and know he has issues with chewing and biting.
He even has some chipping to his teeth from his days as a beaver. Even this is age appropriate...to a point. However, he bit other children six times in three days this past week. He bit the same child three times, once on the face. So on Friday I had the conversation with the director that they were doing all they could but he would not be able to stay there if he didn't stop. I am beside myself knowing how to stop a behavior that they won't even use timeout for when I am not around. I also dread the thought of having to uproot Joseph yet again because of his little brother. So, I pray and ask that others do the same.
On another note entirely I have now received the boys new social security cards with names changed, have submitted forms to health and life insurance, and sent in paperwork for the new certificate of citizenship. I cannot believe that these two have only been here six months and life has settled to the point it has. I think frequently to a year ago when I had received (and lost) their referral and was wondering what God's plan was in this crazy adoption adventure. For all who continue to wait, know that every step of the journey is a part of God's plan that will soon make sense. Even what we now face I realize will ultimately be for the best. Even if that means starting the search all over again.
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| Yes, his teeth did that damage |
Wednesday, June 8, 2011
Birthday and more
We celebrated Joseph's 4th birthday the second time with a Diego party on May 15th with family and friends. Despite the cool, drizzly weather we enjoyed some grilled burgers, cake, ice cream, and lots of presents. Just as the smile of a bride cannot be recreated after her wedding day, Joseph did not share that big smile for his birthday party day. I think perhaps he was a bit overwhelmed by all of the attention but he got right into the act of tearing presents open and couldn't decide which new toy to play with first.
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| Blowing out the birthday candles. He actually got excited and blew them out before we finished singing, so we had to light them back up for the picture |
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| Jacob quite enjoyed the birthday cake! |
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