Saturday, June 18, 2011

A big hurdle

Well, we have finished up two weeks of daycare now and I wish I could say all is well. There were some major stressors week one as Jacob refused to eat and Joseph refused to sleep for the first two to three days. They were both exhausted by the end of the week and seemed to delight in punishing me every moment we were together.
Joseph has done remarkably well adjusting to his "school" and seems now to be settling into a routine.  I believe it was day two that I was one of the last mothers to arrive and heard him sobbing from the moment I walked in the door. When I got to him he was full body hysterical saying "but my mama." When he saw me he all but collapsed saying he didn't think I was coming back. I knew he was reminded of the orphanage from our first visit but had no idea he would be so affected. We now have the same conversation every morning as I reassure him that I will be back after work. He is now sleeping and delights in telling me "I took a nap" as soon as I arrive. He has already advanced to a new class because of his 4th birthday and now has a fluffy African American teacher and a best friend Kayla. Besides the fact that he has a head full of congestion and has been coughing non-stop for three days, he is doing very well and looks forward to his time at school.
Jacob is another story. Praise God we have now advanced past his spending every moment at home crying and saying "no" to everything I do. He has cried every day but two when I leave him but greets me with a big "MAMA" and a hug and kiss every afternoon. He is now eating and continues to nap, though a much shorter and earlier nap than he is used to. I know that the reaction to being left is age appropriate but I was nevertheless very excited when he hopped down, said goodbye, and went about playing on Thursday...without a tear. The big issue is a BIG issue as he has begun biting his friends to get what he wants. Now, anyone who has been around this child knows this is not new. You can look at his crib from Ethiopia and know he has issues with chewing and biting.
He even has some chipping to his teeth from his days as a beaver. Even this is age appropriate...to a point. However, he bit other children six times in three days this past week. He bit the same child three times, once on the face. So on Friday I had the conversation with the director that they were doing all they could but he would not be able to stay there if he didn't stop. I am beside myself knowing how to stop a behavior that they won't even use timeout for when I am not around. I also dread the thought of having to uproot Joseph yet again because of his little brother. So, I pray and ask that others do the same.

On another note entirely I have now received the boys new social security cards with names changed, have submitted forms to health and life insurance, and sent in paperwork for the new certificate of citizenship. I cannot believe that these two have only been here six months and life has settled to the point it has. I think frequently to a year ago when I had received (and lost) their referral and was wondering what God's plan was in this crazy adoption adventure. For all who continue to wait, know that every step of the journey is a part of God's plan that will soon make sense. Even what we now face I realize will ultimately be for the best. Even if that means starting the search all over again.
Yes, his teeth did that damage




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